I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
