that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Randomize
