AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Randomize