i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
What a dumb baby whore.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
