Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
