Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
