I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
