she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
