I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
