As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize