i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
