all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
