: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
