Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
