im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Randomize
