Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
