at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
