So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
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