my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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