Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I said "one day" and that day is not today
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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