So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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