For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
