Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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