you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
