My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I just googled if crying burns calories
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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