So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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