why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
where are you?
Hypothermia
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
