Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
