i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
