I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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