i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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