Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
