It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
