found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
