Where is the hickey?
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
