Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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