I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
