Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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