So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
