He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
