Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
