We should be called the Road Head Warriors
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
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