Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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