Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Randomize
