i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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