You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
