You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Randomize
