I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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