wrigley field is MILF paradise
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Randomize
