I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
