Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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